I am SO excited! Friday morning my sister-friend, MaryBear Kicks-the-Dog is picking me up and we are heading to her place (about 30 miles from here) where I'll spend TWO GLORIOUS WEEKS! Our beloved holy man, Larger, is getting married pretty soon and this will be the last time all of us - the Traditional kolas (Indians) - are able to get together at one time WITH him beforehand. Though both MB and I ARE going, not everyone will be able to go to New Mexico to attend the marriage ceremony (that's where his bride-to-be is from) so because Larger is going to be in our area for a few days, we thought we'd all have a gathering. There is a HUGE kola population in and around this part of Texas, but there are only about 50 of us who live as Traditionalists. That just means we believe the old ways - the spiritual way, I mean. As I told someone else, we are sort of a 'Kola Cult'!

THIS IS NO ONE I KNOW BUT OUR TRADITIONAL FOLKS DO NOT LIKE THEIR PICTURES TAKEN SO I TOOK THIS ONE FROM THE INTERNET. THE DANCE COSTUME IS SIMILAR TO MANY OUR MEN WEAR.

BWAHAHAHA. I'm joking, of course. We are simply some of the only ones who have never gravitated toward Christianity or other better known religions. At any rate, because I am QUITE caught up with all my editing (YAY) I'm able to go. My housemate will come too, for the 2nd week. SOOOOOO ... I am wishing all of you a wonderful 2 weeks and I will bug you again around the 12th of May! 'BYE-'BYE!!!!!!

                                            

WHY I AM GRATEFUL FOR JOHNNY DEPP

I've been in and out of a VERY serious bout of depression for over a month now. Yes, I'm sure you HAVE noticed, those of you who just said, "No KIDDING!" I won't make excuses. I won't offer apologies. I certainly won't even TRY to deny it. Part of it is the Bipolar thing which - despite being toned down with  meds - is still WITH me; a part of me. Part of it is a seasonal darkness that drops a big net over me the first day of Spring and STAYS with me until about the middle of May. I don't LIKE Spring. That's a HUGE understatement. Part of it is little stuff - aggravations - that are tiny pinches to my state of mind. Together they add up to BIG bruises. I'm TRYING to be silly. I am. I'm working on tearing a big hole in this net so I can claw my way OUT. I'm getting there. But the truth is, right now I cry more than at any other time of year. Frankly, I'm SICK of bursting into spontaneous tears. Did I mention that I HATE this time of year? Oh. Well, it was worth repeating. I KNOW I'm starting to make headway though because last night I saw something that made me REALLY happy. Johnny Depp is FINALLY getting to play Tonto in the modern movie version of the Lone Ranger.  (Okay. So it doesn't  TAKE a lot to make me happy!) Johnny DOES have some kola (Indian) blood. He LOOKS more 'INDIAN' than I do, and I'm TECHNICALLY 1/2. (My Comanche relatives will QUICKLY tell anyone that in THEIR eyes AND hearts, I'm 100% one of the PEOPLE.)  Never-the-less Johnny has wanted to play this part for ages. I'm SO glad he will. He says HIS take on Tonto will be - ummmm - a bit his own. Are we surprised? I'M surely not! He also explained the look he chose for the part. He saw a picture of an Indian man from the 1800s. The man's face paint was similar and the photographer had taken the picture when a crow was right over his head. Johnny said it seemed as though it was ON his head, thus ... this look.

I'm going to say something at this point. It make cause you pretty, young women out there to go, "EEEEEEEWWWW!" to even THINK that someone MY age, MY size, and with MY plain appearance would HAVE such thoughts. To you I say, "Get over yourself. I'm OLD, HEAVY, AND BUTT UGLY. BUT I'M NOT DEAD!" Okay - here goes. Johnny is H-O-T. Oh, yeah! Quirky, funny, brilliant. But also SEXY TO THE MAX! (I happen to find quirkiness VERY sexy! And his butt is good, too!) Alrighty. Now that I've totally grossed you all completely OUT, I'll stop here. Thanks for reading my self-indulgent post with an 'eeeewwwwie' twist! So you will know, it DID help me forget for a few minutes about crying. And that's a GOOD thing because I'm running low on tissues. 'Bye now! 

MURDEROUS INTENT OR JUST STUPIDITY??????

It seems that every year since he retired, my housemate has made at least one concerted effort to kill me. Oh, yes! I AM serious! He just began his fourth year of retirement on February 13th of this year, and already he's attempted homicide. Sigh. I'm becoming rather weary of trying NOT to be killed. I have other things on my agenda, thank you very much. Now, please don't misunderstand me. He isn't really a BAD sort, you know. He's simply clueless. Keep in mind, if you will, one of his very first questions about a week after retiring. He interrupted me in the middle of a big editing job to ask, "Uh ... where do we keep the milk?" WTF???? The MILK? Really? I could understand had he asked where I keep the Swiffer Duster or the matches for candles or any NUMBER of other things. But the MILK, Ray? In a very irritated, incredulous sweet, patient voice, I answered, "Well, I USED to keep it in the attic, but recently I got tired of climbing those rickety steps so I decided there was room for it in that gadget over there where I toss the OTHER food." I SWEAR (Scout's honor) that he headed toward the freakin' PANTRY. (Give me strength!) I try to be patient with him. The man worked from age 16 until retiring at 68. He missed only 12 days in all those years. One of those was when the tip of his finger was severed in a printing machine, and even THEN his boss had to INSIST he go to the doctor and NOT just try to get it out of the machine and bandage it back together. Eeeeeew! I was working a Summer JOB there so I KNOW that truly happened. At any rate, I'm the first to say he deserved his retirement. The problem? His interests are VERY limited. He likes to eat, watch tv, do jigsaw puzzles, read, and work in his garden. Period. He'll DO other stuff for short periods of time, but those are his standby activities. Nothing WRONG with those things. But I started realizing they weren't enough when (please, insert dramatic organ music here) the first murder attempt occurred.  It was a dark and stormy night ... oh, no! WAIT! It was YEAR ONE of his retirement, and he had planted a rather extensive veggy garden. Every morning he was out there weeding and watering (not to mention yanking the poor defenseless baby plants out of the soil to 'see if they were done yet') and every single day he would bring me an abundance of gifts. No. Not fresh veggies. FLEAS. Millions of them. They never bit him. They just rode on into Dodge on his shoes and clothes and took up residence in every nook and cranny of body parts I won't even MENTION. I was COVERED in flea bites. COVERED, I tell you! Don't forget, I have a number of health issues as it is. Flea bites did NOT make me feel better. I had them on my feet, legs, even up the wazoo. Not nice, folks. Not fun at ALL! By about the 4th week of this, I was scratching so much I had no BLOOD left in my body. Oh, fine. So that's a SLIGHT exaggeration. Get over it. The itching was - YES! - killing me. I say it's a darned good thing I DIDN'T succumb to his first murder attempt. How humiliating would THAT be to have on one's headstone, "Here lies Kai Naconi who died from scratching her nether regions" ? Jeez Louise!

And now shall we jump ahead to homicide attempt number 2? Very good! Our sweet lil' landlady, Mei Chin, had someone place border plants just outside the screened in patio. They would begin to emerge around late April. They STUNK. Strong, strong oniony smell. I though perhaps they WERE onions. Nope. They turned out to be a VERY poisonous grass which resembled wild onions.
Be absolutely certain when foraging wild edibles. There are plants which are dangerously toxic, even lethal (including death camas which can poison and also water hemlock and foxglove, to name a couple.)

OH, YEAH! We ARE poisonous!

Now, I have an aversion to certain odors. This plant was VERY offensive, causing me to stay OFF THE PATIO during the 2 months it was at its strongest. Even then, the smell would waft in through the windows and make me feel headachey  and irritable; even nauseous. Well, LAST year, Ray decided he'd 'surprise' me and cut the things down. Mind you, they extended around the patio which is, by the way, right outside MY bedroom window, AND over here to the craft room/office. Do you get where this is going? Uh-huh! Thought so. No sooner had he started weed whacking the suckers than the odor permeated EVERYTHING. I will spare you the gory details, but suffice it to say, I was SICK. Go to the ER sick. NOTE: The ER nurse asked me if I had EATEN the plants. Sigh. I was ill and ill-TEMPERED at that point so I will not print my reply. I'm sure you can insert something appropriately similar if you use your (dirtiest) imagination.
    And now we come to THIS year's attempt on my life. It happened Tuesday. Ray was bored. So he decided to wander out to the garage and look for a new way to dispose of me something to entertain himself. We have a mower that never worked (I'll hold onto THAT story for another time) and for whatever the reason, Ray felt he needed to empty it of the SAME gasoline that had occupied it's little tank for the past 3-plus years. Where, you ask, did he empty it? Why, on the DRIVEWAY, of course. I mean, isn't that where YOU would have emptied a full tank of gas? I was in here, editing, and I started REALLY smelling gas. I kept thinking, "What IDIOT is doing something with a car?" I finally got up (dizzy by this time) and went to the front room. Ray was JUST coming inside, reeking of gas and looking quite pleased with himself. I said, "What on EARTH were you doing?" He told me. I suggested he take his happy a** out there and SCRUB the driveway before one of the high school boys who live 2 doors down walked by on the way home from school and tossed a cigarette straight into the gas. My head was killing me at that point and my urge to be ill was getting stronger. He went. Within 5 minutes I smelled THE WORST thing I've ever even IMAGINED. OMG. Before we moved in, our landlady had tossed some old chemicals for the heavy trash people to pick up. One was a giant sized bottle of something  belonging to the former tenant. SHE added that  it stunk to high heaven! Well ... Ray had seen it and thought it was wasteful to get rid of what HE assumed was a cleaning solution. It wasn't. LOOOOONG story short, I ended up spending quite some time throwing up brown blood. Finally called my doctor who said to meet him at his office (we got there around 9:30 P.M.) where he checked me then gave me an emetic. I think I threw up my entire insides. He was NOT happy with Ray when Ray explained what happened. He said Ray could have killed me because my immune system is already so compromised. I was there until the wee hours of the morning. (I have a VERY good doctor.) In the end, Ray went at the crack of dawn and completely scrubbed the chemical mess off the driveway. He was cautioned by the doc to WEAR A MASK AND GLOVES. My ribs are incredibly sore from the effort to get rid of that mess. My shoulder blades too. But I am no longer dizzy or regurgitating brown blood. I DID regurgitate a few unsavory WORDS, I must admit. I have put Ray on notice that THIS would be his FINAL homicide attempt. I am tired of trying not to die. It's ANNOYING. HE will find something SAFE to do for entertainment rather than concocting murder schemes. Otherwise, we will shake hands and part ways. I don't NEED a housemate. At least NOT one who pulls these kinds of stunts, thank you very much! And I told him that he is going to have to cut down on the coffee because every single time he drinks too many cups, HE gets hyper and I pay the price.    

You've been WARNED, old fella! You HAVE to do something else. How about taking up golf? Just go somewhere ELSE to play it, please! Somewhere FAR from this house!                                         

MY DEAR FRIEND SANDY

I met Sandy Whittley through a dollmaking group in 2004 when I was first online. Like me, she lives in Texas, although in West Texas as opposed to Southeast Texas. We became close friends almost instantly, and have written NEARLY every day ( the exception being only when one of us was out of town or super, super busy) for the last 8 years and 2 months. Sandy has just had heart surgery, and was released only to get complications. I spoke with her hubby tonight and he said more surgery is upcoming Wednesday. Some of you know Sandy. Others don't, but I figure ALL good thoughts, well-wishes, and prayers - however and whatever you believe - will surely help. I realize I'm silly most of the time, but I LOVE my friend, and I ask you, my other friends, to please put in a thought for her recovery. THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!

                                                  

A CREDIT, A LETTER, AND A CHALLENGE

This morning as I was reading blogs, I found something on Anna's (http://mylifeandkids.com/) which gave me an idea. So the FIRST thing I want to do is credit Anna for the original post and beg her NOT to feed me to Big Hairy Dog for running with it! Note: I already told her I was going to post my version of this idea. Anyway, Anna wrote a letter to herself; her YOUNGER Anna self. It was funny, thought-provoking, inspiring, and - did I say FUNNY? I loved it! I hope you'll all go over and read her post. But it started me thinking (And you ALL know that, with ME, thinking is a dangerous thing - LOL!) Why not throw out a challenge to all of YOU to write a letter to YOUR younger selves on YOUR blogs? What would you tell yourself at various ages if you had the opportunity? Would you give yourself warnings? Chastise yourself for a bad decision? Be your own cheerleader? All of the above and perhaps more? Portions or all of some letters may be funny or sad or heart-wrenching. So here it is - a challenge to you to talk to yourself at ONE earlier age or at MANY ages. I am going to do that very thing in just a moment. If YOU are going to join in the Letter to Yourself challenge, leave a message on my blog so we can all go and read what you wrote, okay? And now I give you MY letter to Younger Kai: 

1. Age 5 - It's okay that you don't have any toys. You will learn to MAKE your toys from what you find. Leaves and acorn shells will be your dishes. Sticks wrapped in a rag will be your baby doll. And someday, Kai, all that making something from nothing will lead you to love creating and you will find yourself surrounded by 'things' to turn into something.
2. Age 7 - Your teacher just called you a 'smart cookie' because you were the only one in the class to figure out that there was more than 1 combination of numbers to total 10. Okay, you will never be strong in math but your ability to think clearly and your huge desire to learn EVERYTHING will serve you well in life. You will become a voracious reader and you will pass that love of reading to a LOT of children. Someday you will recall this moment and how proud your teacher's praise made you feel. And it will help YOU to be a teacher who wants to make HER students feel that same self pride!
3. Age 8 - Tonight, the first night of Spring, 1957, brought terrors you never even imagined. Your father has ALWAYS beaten you and screamed at you. But tonight he raped you. You are so numb you can't think, and the smell of gardenias from the window outside the bedroom is one you will hate your entire life. This WON'T be the last time. He will - in the next three years, do unspeakable things to you, including letting each of his 4 'business associates' borrow you for an hour  every Saturday morning. In exchange, HE will be the car dealer they go to for their new vehicles. I know you are sad, scared, angry, and physically beaten down. But you will be whole one day. You WILL. The traumas you will encounter will make you a STRONG person and you will learn to find joy in the smallest things. And you will NEVER harm a child. You will also NEVER drive because cars are synonymous with evil, evil men. But you will learn to get around every inch of Houston on a bus!
4. Age 9 -  Your special and wonderful grandparents are teaching you who you ARE, that you are part of a beautiful culture and you BELONG to the People. You will soak up the stories, the oral history, the language, the dances, and you will cherish it for your entire life. Don't cry because you don't look like your mother's side of the family. Kaku - Grandmother - and your Aunt Adeca told you that you ARE completely Comanche because your heart and beliefs are. They give you a Washing Away Ceremony to rid you of the 'bad man's' blood. Listen to your grandparents because they are going to die only 2 days apart in 8 more months. Don't waste a second of the precious time with them.
5. Age 14 - You are in Junior High school and you are a really good student. You love everything about school. But the other kids find you strange because you aren't allowed to participate in any extracurricular activities after school, you wear odd clothes (hand-me-downs from your father's twin nieces who are half your height and straight as sticks) you smell funny because you are given only 2 10-minutes bathroom times per day (one at 6 A.M. and the other at 6 P.M.) so you never DO have time to properly scrub yourself though you try. But don't feel sad because by mid-year you will have become friends with the other members of the school chorus and you will learn how funny you can be when you relax. Your humor will be the cover you use for all your days to mask what a mess you are inside. And it will be the BIGGEST part of what finally helps you to let go of your childhood.
6. Age 44 - you will learn, after 2 failed marriages, that while not all men are evil, you do not NEED a man to make you whole. This will be the biggest and best revelation, and one which will be the final step in your healing. So stop looking. You have joy, good friends, and a great deal of happiness ahead. You truly DO, Kai.
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I warned you that it may not be pretty. But in writing those things to myself and exposing them to all of you, I actually REALIZED something: I am STRONG. And I've made a good life for myself. I also realized that at three different points I almost deleted this entire post because it's so very personal. But I DIDN'T. And that tells me I am NOT ashamed of who I used to think I was. I'm silly old Kai, a darned good editor, a creator of somewhat bizarre things, a collector of books, a person who is Bipolar, a VERY GRATEFUL survivor, a VERY PROUD Comanche, and a VERY EVOLVED woman!
Suvate! This is what I had to say!

FASHION STATEMENTS, LACK OF COMMON SENSE, OR A LEAP INTO INSANITY?

Yesterday I was reading blogs and checking in with my grandkids on Facebook. I read and saw a lot of things that made me laugh (in a good way) a few that inspired me, a few that brought up memories, and a couple that made my one sighted eye just about pop out of my head. Let me begin with the eye-popper photo.

What on EARTH was this girl THINKING? You may laugh, but I have to tell you that I found this INCREDIBLY sad. I wondered if her mother SAW her on the way out the door and asked, "Are you OUT OF YOUR MIND? You can't go out in that! My heavens! You can't even wear that in the HOUSE!" Why didn't SOMEONE stop her? Did she actually think that was a great look? Did she think it looked sexy? Is she delusional? Where is that poor girl's sense of fashion? MORE to the point - did she even THINK to look in the mirror - front side AND back, thank you - before she stepped out of the house? I understand fads. In my day - a million centuries back - we went through a multitude of them: tent dresses, mini-skirts, flower-child attire, Beatle haircuts (the boys) chalky pink-almost-white lipstick and black eyeliner,  hot pants, beehive hairdos, etc. I shudder to recall a few of those. But never - never, never, NEVER - would it have crossed my mind to put ON, much LESS actually WEAR what that poor misguided girl is wearing. I can't believe she INTENTIONALLY wore that. I am going to believe that either she wore a totally well-fitting outfit OUT THE DOOR, and got caught in a horrendous rainstorm which immediately caused her clothing to shrink. OR that she was in such a hurry to leave, she accidentally grabbed her 4-year-old sister's clothes, crammed them on, and shot out the door. Surely - oh, PLEASE tell me - SURELY, she didn't think that looked GOOD. Makes me want to embrace my old tent dress.   

JUST THE RIGHT MEDICINE!

HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE! I hope you all had a PERFECT holiday! As for me - Ahhhhhh! I'm just SO HAPPY this afternoon! Today was PERFECT! In fact, my weekend was perfect! My good friend, MaryBear Kicks-the-Dog, her older daughter, and some of our other 'kola' friends came over to spend the weekend. We had a total blast. No 'special' activities - just lots of talking, coffee drinking, giggling, eating, creating, and BEING. My wonderful friend Chirp (Cherie) emailed and said MaryBear is good medicine for me. She's 100% RIGHT! (I think a dose of Chirp would do me lots of good, too! Hmmm ... I wish we could arrange that!) Anyway, I hope all of you had SUCH a happy weekend/Easter! Wouldn't it be fun if LOTS of us in Blogland could get together for a weekend? We'd have to oil our jaws, for SURE! Anyway, nothing much to report - I just wanted to say I'm back to myself (poor all of you - LOL!) - so expect a bunch of silliness coming soon! Now I'm going to go watch one of my favorite reruns of Little House on the Prairie! (Stop laughing. I LOOOOOVE that show!) 

I DEFINATELY DON'T KNOW WEATHER I LIKE READING BETTER THEN BLOGGING

    I SEE you! You just read my post title and swallowed your tongues didn't you, bloggy-friends? Yes, you did! ADMIT IT! You thought Lil' Miss Grammar Police over here had completely lost her ability to SPELL, right? BWAHAHAHAHA. In your DREAMS! I had a blog devoted entirely TO grammar, but I got so busy for a while that I discontinued it.
   However, the last few days I've seen a number of things (primarily on Facebook) which prompted this post. And, yes! I AM going there; back to my teacher mode. So if you are not in the mood for a spelling/word usage lesson, feel free to ignore this post! I will totally understand. HEY! You with the misplaced modifiers - GET YOUR BUTT BACK OVER HERE! YOU NEED THIS!
   What began my eye rolling yesterday was a young man on Facebook (an inlaw to one of my grandchildren) who kept calling dogs 'retarted.' I took it upon myself to generously obnoxiously 'help' him. I explained that the root or base word is retard meaning slow. Therefore, something which is SLOW is RETARDED. ReTARTed is (currently) not a word. I showed him how we may CREATE a meaning for his word. Example: The little girl ate all her carrots and begged for a second dessert. So her mother gave her a second apple tart or retarted her. (LOL!) NOW he may use that non-word in its semi-correct context.
   The NEXT faux pas I happened upon was one I see quite a bit. Definately. Sigh. Let's go to its base word: DEFINE. Do YOU see an 'A'? No? Good. Neither do I. All that's needed is the suffix 'ly' on the base word to spell it as it was intended to be spelled: Definitely!
   Likewise, the word whose definition means 'to divide' is often misspelled this way: seperate. Here's a trick. There is a RAT in the word. Oh, yes! Sep(arat)e. See that little critter? Now you'll NEVER misspell it, will you? 
    Another common error involves a homonym or word SOUNDING like another word but having a different meaning: WEATHER. Personally, I do NOT consider weather and 'whether' to BE homonyms, but for whatever the reason, they seem to be considered linked in that way. We all know that WEATHER is the atmosphere's condition. WHETHER is a word connoting alternatives. They cannot be interchanged. NOR can my final example - than - be interchanged with THEN. I often read things such as, "I knew better then to go to that store." Sigh. THEN is an adverb describing something  time-related. "We went to the movie then to dinner." THAN is a conjunction linking two comparatives. "She is a better speller THAN I am." 
   Do I sound nitpicky? Good! I am! I studied to be a Grammarian. Truly! No, there IS no such position these days. There hasn't BEEN such a position for YEARS. But there USED to be. And I wanted to BE one. I love words. I handle them carefully because they have as much power as an explosive and as much tenderness as a child's kiss. And in this day of easily accessible spell-check and online thesaurus availability, I am compelled to get out my ruler and ask for the offending hands of those who don't USE them!
   Okay! With that said, the Grammar Police is off duty!

NOTE: When I first posted this, I intentionally left three spelling and grammar errors within the post. Either NO ONE recognized them - sigh -  or no one had the nerve to correct me. So I went ahead and fixed them. C'mon, now! Although those 3 errors were planted to see what people would say, I DO make ACTUAL careless errors now and then when I'm hurrying. So to those of you who saw them and kept quiet, you would have done me a favor to correct me! In the event that I DO screw up, I beg to be corrected! When your OUTSIDE looks as bad as mine does, you DEFINITELY do NOT want to look as though your brain is ugly, round, and useless too! Okay. Now go read your dictionaries. 'Bye!        

IT'S AN EGG, IT'S A PLANE ... IT'S NOT SUPERMAN BUT IT IS SUPER WONDERFUL!

 I SHOULD have posted this LONG ago, but I was so busy having my lil' pity party I didn't. THAT'S okay! I will NOW! I HAVE to show you all something extremely cute and clever! My very special and wonderful friend Chirp (Cherie Day) was in an altered egg swap. You know - those paper mache eggs from Hobby Lobby or Michael's! Well, I haven't SEEN the eggs from the other swappers but Chirp has hers posted on her blog. Because she's very low-key (TRANSLATION: NOT a big-mouth like KAI) I was afraid people would perhaps not see this small masterpiece. I have to tell you, had anyone told ME I had to alter an egg, I would have done something mundane and expected. Check out my girl's creation! SHE turned it into a ride! Like the ones we all see outside or just INSIDE grocery stores! Hers is an airplane with it's own RIDER! How adorable and SMART is THAT? I'm BEYOND IMPRESSED! For more views of the different sides of this eggplane, please visit her blog at http://cherieday.blogspot.com/ and leave her a little comment! THANKS!!! I think she's AMAZING!

 

'REDGIRL' TURNS GREEN!

My GRACIOUS but I've been a grouch lately! That's not ME! Seriously. I REALIZED I was beginning to annoy MYSELF with all my grumbling so I figured I MUST be getting on YOUR nerves! And with that acknowledged, I hereby humbly apologize! (Am I forgiven? Pretty please?) I won't go into ALL the truly GRUMPWORTHY things that led up to the emergence of  my MEAN KAI persona, but I WILL tell you a couple of the petty things that were the fingernails on my emotional chalkboard. Imagine me already veeeeeeeery close to the end of my rope.

Ahhhh ... I see you are getting the picture!  Funny how we jump in and deal with the BIG things, then allow the smaller things to do us in! THAT'S what I did! I was tired, not feeling physically well, and the little stuff just wouldn't quit biting me in my oversized butt! Mostly it was the neighbors. They are ALWAYS - uh - unconventional, but now that the weather's heated up and we open windows, I am getting WAY too big a dose of them! The people on this block are seriously NUTS. No, I'm NOT exaggerating! One thing that perhaps DOESN'T bother other 'normal' folks drives ME up the proverbial wall. What, you ask, would THAT be? Repetitious NOISE. Especially if the noise is also LOUD. The people on this block are excellent at CREATING loud, repetitious noises!

                                                 ... all that NOISE, NOISE, NOISE, NOISE!
            The WORST one? LEAF BLOWERS! OMG! If it isn't the woman across the street, it's the woman next door OR the guys from a lawn care aka torture company who do three lawns on this street all on the same day. By the time they finish, I am climbing walls and threatening (under my breath) to grab the **** things out of their sweaty lil' hands and cram them (at full BLAST) up their posteriors.

The old Grinch may have shoved the TREES up the chimneys, but KAI is going to shove some LEAF BLOWERS up some ...

Huh? You think I'm JOKING, right? Or possibly exaggerating? NOT ONE BIT! Then there's the family down the street. The parents are into only one hobby - procreating - because they have 8 stair step aged brats little kids and THREE teens. THAT isn't my problem. I LOVE kids. Just not THESE kids! The teens race their cars up and down the street at all hours of the day and night, often hollering stuff in LOUD Spanish at their siblings who are, for some bizarre reason, outside in their freakin UNDERWEAR at any given time. But it's the middle boy and girl who drive me over and OFF the brink of sanity. Why? Because they honestly seem to believe they can play in ANYONE'S yard at any time, day or night. HE brings his basketball, loudly bouncing it along the way, then - if ours is the 'chosen' yard, bouncing it against the side of our HOUSE. SHE follows her brother WITH their two obnoxious, UNLEASHED yippy lil' dogs who are ALWAYS barking their heads off, and in her high-pitched voice, carries on a running one-way conversation with Basketball Boy. When we first moved here, I asked them nicely to play in their OWN yard ESPECIALLY AFTER NIGHTFALL. The boy grasped his basketball, looked me in the eyes, and said, in Spanish, to stick it!  I let him know I understand and speak fluent Spanish and I went to his parents. Their response? They said this is not MY neighborhood. REALLY???? I would have SWORN I pay $1,100 a month to LIVE here. They rarely come in my actual YARD anymore but they and their OTHER family members drive me INSANE. Okay - granted, I may sound unreasonable.  But I AM Bipolar, you know. And while I ALWAYS take my meds, it DOESN'T mean I'm CURED. I'll always be Bipolar. Invasions of my private space make me WANT to throttle someone. Invasions of my peace and quiet, make me come dangerously NEAR to actually DOING it!

... I MUST STOP ALL THIS NOISE!

The other thing driving me bananas is people who do not stop their dogs from barking all day and night. We are the ONLY people ON this block without an addition to the canine choir. I'm not even GOING into that aggravation. I'm just NOT a big fan of dogs, anyway, and WAY less when they do not allow me to rest. My housemate thinks I need to get an earplug for my left (hearing) ear. WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO???? The dog owners need to take their dogs INSIDE and let those dogs keep THEM awake. GRRRRR!
Yes. I sound like the neighborhood horror, don't I? And, yes! If I had the $$ I'd buy a HUGE piece of property FAR away from people. I love to socialize but ...! Sigh. So those issues, plus some recent health issues have turned me into a

BIG. OLD. GRINCH.!!!

I'm calming down now, though. I PROMISE I will be more myself from now on. And we'll blog happily ever after. So feel free to read my silliness again. I'm back to being ME!

 Uhhhh, wait ... you don't play basketball in other people's yards, do you? Or own a yippy dog that BARKS 24/7???? If that's the case, GET OFF MY BLOG!!!!!!! (Just kidding. Sorta. HeeHee!)
P.S. (Added a day after I posted this.) Late yesterday evening I heard water running outside our livingroom window. I thought my absentminded housemate had left the front faucet on after watering the front yard plants and I peeked out. Uhhhh ... nope! It was one of Basketball Boy's little brothers, happily PEEING on our rose bush. I said, "HEY! STOP THAT!" He looked up at me and calmly finished his business, adjusted himself, stuck out his tongue, and off he went. GOOD GRIEF!